Montessori at home

Some helpful guidelines for parents to encourage their children to grow at home

FOLLOW THE CHILD

• Concept: This idea is at the core of Montessori education. It reflects the belief that children will gravitate towards activities that are developmentally appropriate and relevant. We carefully watch which activities children choose, what aspects of are interesting to them, what seems to captivate them. We let children tell us what they want and need to grow.
  
• Practically: We make time to just sit and watch what they are doing and interested in. We look at each question and statement as a window into their world. Some parents might jot down notes as a way to condition themselves to notice the details.
  

SIMPLIFY ADULT ACTIVITIES

• Concept: Children are interested in being capable and competent. They long to do the mundane tasks that adults do on a day to day basis. We can respect this by creating simplified aspects of adult activities and allow children to be productive in this way.
• Practically: If a child seems interested in helping you make cake you can put them in charge of mixing the eggs (in an oversized bowl), of mixing batter as you add ingredients, of pouring in the measured ingredients, of telling you when the timer buzzed. When you do laundry your child can fold the towels, pair or fold the socks, sort the whites.
  

ENABLE INDEPENDENCE

• Concept: Childhood development has at its core a series of steps toward greater independence (crawling, walking, talking etc). When children are allowed to be independent they are more motivated to take responsibility and build a positive identity.
  
• Practically: Create a space where a child can get himself a snack. Crackers or pretzels in a low cabinet works well for this. Hang low hooks so your child can hang his own towel. Teach your child to blow his own nose. Hang a clock or bulletin board at a child’s eye level.
  

RESPECT

• Concept: We try to treat children as real people, with real wants and feelings, instead of “just children”. This is a tricky one because we have an automatic perception of children based on our own childhood. Additionally, people are thrown off by the fact that Torah requires the child to respect the parent not vice versa. We believe that neither our preconceptions, nor kibud av, negate the fact that a child that is respected as a person learns that they have value, they matter, their actions matter and that their parents, family, and all people are worthy of respect.
  
• Practically: Some use the barometer of “Would I do this to an adult?”. We can look children in the eye when we speak. We can not laugh when they make a request. We can explain why we make our choices. We can give a child choices and the right to choose (often just options is ideal). When we force a child to do something we can ask ourselves “Is this important enough to use force?”.
  

DEVELOPMENTAL YEARS

• Concept: The early years of a child’s life contain many “sensitive periods” for a lot of key skills. During these periods a child’s brain is uniquely open to development in these areas and children will gravitate to activities that stimulate this development. Examples are fine motor, gross motor, relating concrete to abstract, colors and shapes etc.
  
• Practically: If we begin to pay attention to these periods (see “follow the child” above), we can keep an eye out for activities that would engage and strengthen this development. Once you identify a sensitive period you can utilize the books above and the tens of “Montessori at Home” blogs that  are full of practical activities that can be created using household objects. You wouldn’t believe how educational Play Doh can be. (Recently we noticed that our one year old daughter would sit by the lego and take utter delight in picking up only the very smallest pieces. We understood this to be her going through a sensitive period for fine motor development.
  

Some excellent resources are Montessori at Home by John Bowman (e-book $11) and How to Raise an Amazing Child The Montessori Way by Tim Seldin (BookDepository.com $18 shipped to Israel).

© Yahalom Montessori